Who turned up the heat?

Got air conditioning? Ugh. It's ridiculously hot and I can't stand it. Thought my brain was frying on my walk home from work yesterday. And I heard it's supposed to be even hotter today which means the two fan system that's been keeping my apartment considerably cooler than outside but not as cool as I'd like it to be isn't gonna cut it tonight. Isn't it supposed to cool down in the evening?? Last night I was over at my folks' place for dinner and around 10:30 pm, I went out into the garage to leave and I thought I'd walked into a sauna. What happened to the rain? The cloud cover? The cool breeze? This is Oregon, dammit, not frickin' Death Valley! I'm about this > < close to heat exhaustion and you know what happens then, right? Hallucinations and talking gibberish. That's right. Me in my normal state times 1000. If you people know what's good for you, you'll figure out a way to turn the heat down and you'll give me a popsicle while we're waiting. One of those red, white and blue rocket pops.... or a push up.... or even a choco taco would do.... anyone? popsicle? anyone?