Altered Ego

I always wanted to be a famous artist and have a pseudonym. I think it must have something to do with the idea that things would be easier, more fun, etc, if I was someone else. Or rather, if people thought I was someone else. So I was reading this book called Shooting Elvis and the main character's name stuck in my head (the chick accidentally blows up LAX, so the rest of the story stuck in my head as well). Nina Zero. So I'm using it. Am I anything like the character? Nah... I've never blown anything up, not even by accident. I've never been to jail and I've never killed anyone. I've never been a photographer and I've never been "on the run." I don't have an affinity for "bad boys" and I have a pretty decent relationship with my parents. I've never married anyone, for money or for love, and I've never sold any of my art to the tabloids. I'm still gonna use her name. It's got a nice ring to it and since she took the name (changed it from Mary Alice Baker) when she needed to become someone else, it's got the right credentials.

When I'm a famous artist (paintings, writing, whatever...), just remember that you knew me before I was Nina Zero. 'Cause she'll probably write about you or mention your name in an interview or dedicate her first gallery show to you... and if for some strange reason something gets accidentally blown up, you can always say, "Nina who?"